Men ... Women!

Two and a half men... How I Met Your Mother... Big Bang Theory... FRIENDS... Russell Peters... The list may be long. But there's one person who rocks forever - JERRY SEINFELD - the ultimate genius of all !

Going with the topic, don't expect a detailed essay on this controversial topic. What I am going to share with you here is a funny take on the subtle differences between men and women by Seinfeld. Got to agree, see one of his episodes (Seinfeld 1989-1999) and you will become his fan!

"I swear, I have absolutely no idea what women are thinking. I don't get it, okay? I I I admit, I, I'm not getting the signals. I am not getting it! Women, they're so subtle, their little everything they do is subtle. Men are not subtle, we are obvious. Women know what men want, men know what men want, what do we want? We want women, that's it! It's the only thing we know for sure, it really is. We want women. How do we get them? Oh, we don't know 'bout that, we don't know. The next step after that we have no idea. This is why you see men honking car-horns, yelling from construction sites. These are the best ideas we've had so far. The car-horn honk, is that a beauty? Have you seen men doing this? What is this? The man is in the car, the woman walks by the front of the car, he honks. E-eeehh, eehhh, eehhh! This man is out of ideas. How does it? E-e-e-eeeehhhh! "I don't think she likes me." The amazing thing is, that we still get women, don't we? Men, I mean, men are with women. You see men with women. How are men getting women, many people wonder. Let me tell you a little bit about our organization. Wherever women are, we have a man working on the situation right now. Now, he may not be our best man, okay, we have a lot of areas to cover, but someone from our staff is on the scene. That's why, I think, men get frustrated, when we see women reading articles, like "Where to meet men?" We're here, we are everywhere. We're honking our horns to serve you better."


Until next time,
Enjoy the last week of 2011! :)

Valai Veechu! :)

Hola! :)

Being in final year is big fun in itself! You come across a few things that are fairly new to you, except the fact that you know they 'exist' in 4th year! Yes - the placements!

You hear about them a lot, but there will surely be no one to tell you how it works, till you manage to the fourth (and hopefully final) year! I am here to tell you what happened so far (till 20/12/11) in SRM University!

Point Number One!

BUILD UP - We got  plenty of it! தாங்க முடியாது (unbearable) !PD Classes we heard "This is life! Get placed in the first company. Else it will be tough. The companies coming after TCS will know you are still unplaced... a ... b ... c ..."

Point Number Two!

THEY ' LL SCARE YOU TILL YOU SHIT YOUR PANTS - Yes, there's no escape in this! We will never know till you reach the December of the final year that there will at least be 25 companies coming to the campus, just for non-placed students!

Point Number Three!

GOT USED TO WEARING FORMALS (For boys only; Girls - you lucky _____!) - Even though we will look like Maths Teachers of yesteryears, that's what they want in interviews! Especially the Black shoes - I managed to fall down twice walking with them! Be careful கை புள்ள (machi)!!!

You cannot show up like this!

Point Number Four!

FOOD - We lost quite a few kilograms! In TCS placements, no faculty had told us we would be sitting till night! Why??? ஏன் இந்த கொலைவெறி மக்களே (why this kolaveri people)? You know very well we would be starving out there! Why couldn't you tell us before???

Point Number Five!

PLACED - It got over 'just like that'! Some times we have felt... "That's it?"

Point Number Six!

THEN COME THE CORE - After getting placed in IT companies, we have to sit for the core ones! People like Microsoft, Global Scholar, etc. come and we have to sit for all those!

So far, it was all normal to SRM! Let me share what will happen from now on... (Thanks to our batch!)

* Microsoft came in the last week of October. They said results would come not later than December '10. Results not yet published!

"இனி சென்னை பக்கமே வர மாட்டோம்! (We will never show up anywhere even near to Chennai!)" - Microsoft அதிரடி பேட்டி! (Guess our answer sheets did the trick! We never asked for subjective aptitude! Your headache that! Now, publish our results!

* Some companies did not select even one student!

"இதற்கும் எங்களுக்கும் எந்த சம்மந்தமும் இல்லை!" -  மாணவர்கள் சரமாரி!

("We have nothing to do with this!" - Students )

* "அடுத்த வருடம் TCS வருவதே சந்தேகம்! Juniorகள் நிலைமை கவலைக்கிடம்!"
(TCS coming next year is highly doubtful! Juniors very much worried)

(Reports have it that TCS took more people in Sastra University compared to SRM. See - confirmation!

MBA placements in SRM affected due to this!)

* "நாங்க தான் டா gethu! இனிமே எந்த company வருது பாப்போம்!" (We are the DONs! Let's see which Company shows up from now on!) - 2012 batch students terror interview!

* "நாங்க எழுதின எழுத்து அப்படி!" (It's our WRITINGS!) - last bench guys of CSE department

* Some company gave feedback "These people don't even know to write 'for' loop!" :D

"நான் கேட்டேனா?" (Did we ask?)

* Oracle வருது ன்னு சொன்னங்க! பயபுள்ள தப்பிச்சுட்டானுங்க! ( We heard Oracle was coming. Lucky fellows, escaped!)

* யார் holidays அ யார் கெடுக்கறது??? (Who are they to spoil our holidays???) Mind it!

* "எங்க மானத்த காப்பாத்துங்க!" (Please save our faces!) - பல்கலைக்கழக ஆசிரியர்கள் வேண்டுகோள்! (Professors request students)

* "இது எதிர் கட்சி சதி!"... குமுறுகிறார்... (.)

p.s. (Disclaimer) This is just a funny report of the reality. SRM is actually good with many companies coming in! You will surely get a nice job, and if lucky, there's enough room to take your girlfriend to the same company! Plan accordingly! You can get dual placements - one in IT, one in core). SRM has it all! A wonderful campus placement record. Nothing to worry at all! :) SRM rocks - I stay with that!

மீண்டும் சந்திப்போம்! (See you again! Au revoir!)

ak

'The Hindu'!

Hi guys,
I recently came across this 'nice' article in 'The Hindu' - our National newspaper! (No matter what 'sleeping' ad 'The Times of India' gives, South India will always buy THE HINDU! You morons!)

BE AN ANNOYING FLIGHT PASSENGER

You've paid for your flight ticket, so you have every right to utilise everything on board to the best of your ability. Too bad most flights these days don't pass around trays filled with candies. Luckily, this is an international flight and they are serving ice-cream, so grab two. And if the air hostess doesn't look amused, tell her: “I paid nearly Rs. 40,000 for the ticket,yaar !” Next up, the pretzels, peanuts and liquor are brought your way. Grab a beer, tune into your favourite entertainment channel, preferably a comedy show, noisily bite into those peanuts and guffaw loudly at what's on your screen. When dinner is served, opt for whatever your co-passenger isn't ordering. And when the food arrives, dig into his tray just to ‘sample' what it tastes like

The flight attendants are at your service, so keep hitting that button to get their attention. “Water,” “Wine,” “Newspaper”, “Warm water this time”... Obviously after all that liquid intake, you need to make frequent trips to the rest room. You've got the window seat and you've also got long legs. So, every time you get up and go, you end up kicking your co-passenger who politely requests you to trade seats with him. Stick your tongue out at him, and say: “I came early just to get the window seat. Better luck next time”

Alright, the cabin lights have been dimmed, and it's time to get some sleep. But, you have to finish watching almost all the in-flight entertainment available. What if you fell asleep, and didn't wake up till the flight was just about to land? So, while people try to nap, you continue munching on the snacks, clapping and laughing. And finally, when people are beginning to rise and shine, you must get some rest. Recline your seat as much as possible. So what if the passenger behind finds it difficult? Now lean back, rest your arms on the armrest even if it means dislodging your co-passenger's from there. Also ask him to turn off his reading light as it interferes with your sleep

Forty five minutes to reach your destination. You see people getting up to head to the rest room. Jump up and dart in with your tooth brush and face wash. Brush your teeth, wash and moisturise your face, comb your hair, change your clothes if you like. Take your time. The others can wait. They will have their turn too, right?

Time to disembark. You don't want to be stuck behind. Be the first one to get up even while the flight is still taxing, yank open the overhead locker, drag your luggage out and rush to the exit door. Then whip out your phone and frantically shout into it: ‘Landed, don't park the car... save on parking charges. I'll be there in half an hour. You keep driving around in circles, ok?”

Well suited for us! :D

Until next time,

Have fun! :) It's DECEMBER!!!

ak